A woman says she was completely taken aback when her brother’s fiancée asked to wear her late mother’s wedding dress

“She said my mom would have wanted her to wear it since she’s joining the family,” the woman wrote on Reddit

Angry woman bride and groom
Upset woman (stock image); bride and groom (stock image). Photo: Getty

A woman says she was completely taken aback when her brother’s fiancée asked to wear her late mother’s wedding dress — and she promptly refused the request.

The 30-year-old explained the dress dilemma in a recent post on Reddit, beginning by sharing just how special and important the dress is to her.

“I lost my mom five years ago. Before she passed, she gave me her wedding dress. She told me she wanted me to have it, whether I chose to wear it at my own wedding, repurpose it or just keep it as a memory of her,” the OP (original poster) wrote, adding, “It’s one of the most sentimental things I own.”

She went on to detail that her older brother Jake, 33, is getting married in a few months to his fiancée Laura, 29. The two future sister-in-laws have “a good relationship” but are “not super close,” she said.

Last week, Laura asked to meet up for coffee — “and that’s when she dropped a bombshell,” the OP wrote.

“She told me she had always dreamed of wearing a ‘meaningful’ dress when she got married and thought it would be so special if she could wear my mom’s wedding dress,” she continued. “She said it would be a beautiful way to honor my mom at the wedding.”

Wedding dress preserved in a box
Wedding dress stored in a box (stock image).Tom Merton/Getty

The OP, who recalled feeling “completely off guard” in the moment, politely denied Laura’s request and explained her reasons why.

“I told her that while I appreciated her sentiment, my mom gave the dress to me, and it was very personal. I wasn’t comfortable letting someone else wear it, especially because I still might want to use it in some way for my own wedding one day,” she wrote.

It seems Laura did not take the OP’s refusal well. “She immediately got upset and said I was being selfish,” the OP recounted. “She told me it wasn’t fair because she never got to meet my mom, and this would be a way for her to feel connected to her. She also said my mom would have wanted her to wear it since she’s joining the family.”

She continued: “I stood my ground and told her ‘no.’ I suggested she find another way to incorporate my mom’s memory — maybe by wearing a piece of my mom’s jewelry or a pair of her shoes — but Laura said that wasn’t the same.”

When the OP’s brother found out about the pair’s conversation, he pleaded with his sister to change her mind. “He told me I should reconsider because it would mean a lot to Laura. He said I was being unnecessarily difficult over ‘just a dress,’ ” she wrote. “Even some of my relatives are saying I should ‘think about the bigger picture’ and how this would be a touching tribute.”

Conflict of a young couple, family on New Year's holidays. A young man and a woman are sitting on the couch and arguing. The wife screams and accuses the husband, the husband holds his head.
Man and woman arguing (stock image).Liubomyr Vorona/Getty

The OP concluded her post by asking fellow Redditors if she’s wrong to not let Laura wear the dress. “I feel guilty, but at the same time, this dress means the world to me,” she finished.

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The post received more than 3,000 comments, and the general consensus was that the OP is entitled to do as she pleases with the dress.

“Your mother left it to YOU. Your decision is final. No one gets to tell you otherwise,” one person wrote.

Another commented, “This is your inheritance. No one else is entitled to it. If anyone is being selfish or difficult, it’s your future SIL and brother. The audacity is shocking.”

Quite a few Redditors shared the opinion that the brother and his fiancée are being dismissive of the dress’ emotional significance to the OP.

“It is not just a dress. It was a moment when your mother was glowing with happiness imprinted in that fabric. It is a way for her to share in that same moment and feeling with you,” one person wrote. “Don’t let anyone intrude on that moment you will share, especially since she is gone.

Another agreed, writing: “It’s not ‘just a dress,’ it’s a piece of your mom. Stick to your guns, you have every right to say no. Your brother and relatives are out of line for pressuring you.”